Another week, another pile of disappointment from the AFC East…We saw the darlings of the division lose their first game of the year and the “hot team in the division” continue their slide out of playoff contention. Thank goodness that the Jets got to play the Fins this week or we might be talking about the first winless weekend for the AFC East. So let’s get right to it…
In last place, to no one’s surprise we find the Miami Dolphins. The Fins have sucked on an other worldly level this year and that continued on Sunday when they rolled up I-95 to New Jersey on Sunday. Dan Campbell must be crawling out of his skin thinking about the lack of effort his team has shown in recent weeks. After the Texans game so many weeks ago, Dan yelled at his team that they were sleeping giants that had finally been awoken, he then set forth a credo; “NO NAPS!” Well it appears that he should have at least sent the water boys out on an afternoon Dunkin’ run because the Fins have been incredibly sleepy. Now the man whom most Fin fans were clamoring for to become the next Head Coach, Bill “Frickin” Lazor, who called a grand total of eight running plays on Sunday, has been fired in disgrace. It’s nice to know that the fans are at least as good at running a football team as the folks in the front office are. So the only question left for the Fins is, who are they going to overpay this offseason?
In second to last place we find the Bills aimlessly wandering the Midwestern plains outside of Kansas City. Rex and company really needed this game to keep a tenuous hold on the final wildcard spot and they opened the game by allowing Tyrod and Sammy just go out and play some backyard football. It worked to perfection and the Bill jumped out to an early lead. But we all know that no lead is safe when Alex Smith is the opposing Quarterback…The former #1 overall pick accepted the Bills’ challenge of a shootout and went all Wyatt Earp those rough riders from the Buffalo, with Jeremy Maclin (who now must be considered among the league’s elite) decimating the secondary to the tune of 9 catches for 160 yards. It’s not the Bills’ fault though, Kyle Williams was out and is now on IR and Mario Williams had a scheduling conflict so he missed the game as well…Oh well, this might not be the Bills’ year, but next year definitely will be!
And now is where we get the first major shakeup of the season! The New England Patriots (or what’s left of them) lost to a combination of the Denver Broncos and the officiating crew. I’m not one that will normally put a loss on the officials, they are human and prone to mistakes, but when you see calls like we did on Sunday night (ironically the PIP on Chung was thrown by the same moron that cheated the Lions out of a win against Seattle earlier this year…) and couple that with all of the tension between the league and the Pats all offseason, it kind of raises an eyebrow. And then again, these guys might just be so completely incompetent that they are incapable of doing their jobs right. But hey, at least they get to be overpaid and terrible lawyers in the offseason. To the game; well the Pats looked really good in the first half, then Dante Hightower went out and suddenly the Broncos were averaging about 8 yards per carry and things started to fall apart. Future Hall of Famer, Chris Harper muffed a punt that should have been fair caught, thus handing the Broncos all of the momentum and sealed his fate as a Patriot. Then Rob Gronkowski got called for some ludicrous pass interference calls, Tom Brady’s head was assaulted by some defender (with no call), and then Gronk’s knee was assaulted and all of Pats’ Nation threw in the towel on the season (fortunately were spared by a wonderful medical report). Miraculously, Brady and company were able to drive into field goal position and Stephen Gostkowsi drilled a kick that would make Adam Viniteiri blush. They still lost, but they fought hard. Oh well, now the Pats can be pissed at the world again.
And now for the new first place team. The Jets come in the top spot today by default. They got the good fortune of playing the Dolphins, so Fitz gave all Jet fans false hope again by having one of the best games of his career. It’s nice to know that he’s capable of having an above average game when faced with a Community College level defense. I mean when Devin Smith scores a touchdown, you know the defense is inept- that guy sucks. Brandon Marshall’s good personality showed up this week and made Miko’s husband look like his wife when she’s trying to bust through a security gate…The Jets are clinging to their playoff lives and right now, thanks to a less than mediocre AFC, they look as if they might have a chance (not a real one, but hey the people of New Jersey and Long Island need something to distract them from their depressing existence) to give Andy Dalton his first playoff win.
Good times in the AFC East! At least this week the Pats get the refereeing crew that clearly fixed that Lions’ playoff game last year…
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