Nothing happened last week except that the right to represent the AFC in the Super Bowl was determined between the Pats and the Steelers. No one cares about what transpired in Buffalo, Miami or New Jersey.
So let’s look at what happened in the AFC Championship game. The Steelers came into Foxboro amid a host of controversies. First there was the whole Antonio Brown Facebook situation…AB and the rest of the team said that there was no distraction and that they were wholly focused on the game; seems like a lie to me…And then there was the big story of the weekend, Fire Alarm Gate. For the first time in the history of sports, a fan of the home team found out where the visiting team was sleeping the night before the game and pulled the fire alarm. Obviously this disturbed the Steelers to such a degree that they forgot how to play football. I also pretty sure I heard Tomlin tell a sideline reporter that Bell hurt his groin when he fell getting out of bed as the alarm went off. Then to even things out, the fire alarms at Gillette Stadium went off around noon, forcing an evacuation of the stadium.
So the Steelers entered the game behind the 8-ball and without any real chance of winning. Two controversies, coupled with the fact that the Pats absolutely own them, made this one of the easiest bets of the season (if you are so inclined…). The Steelers, like many other teams before them, lost the game before they even took the field. The Pats took the ball and marched right down the field for the win. Not even Mike Tomlin’s spirit fingers could help overcome the onslaught brought on by the Pats’ exceedingly handsome QB. Even when they had the ball 1st and goal from the 1 foot line, Ben’s gargantuan tits got the way and they went backwards 5 yards and had to settle for a field goal.
As for the Pats. There was much talk in New England last week that the Pats’ #1 scoring defense was a mirage brought on by facing a long line of shitty QBs like Ryan Tannehill and Tyrod Taylor. That when faced with a real QB, with the largest bra size in the league, that they would be screwed. Well, I guess not. The Pats defense showed that they are indeed the greatest defensive unit the league has seen since the 1986 Bears.
Now the Pats get to face the Falcons in the Super Bowl and sit on the precipice of history. Does anyone really believe that a nothing franchise like the Falcons is going to derail that? #driveforfive
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