Another week of the NFL season has come and gone; and we starting to get back to what we expected in the division. It’s still a little weird writing about a division that went 3-1 week after week, but here we are…
Last place is at least the way we all expected it, the New York Jets have set up residency and will be fighting anyone who wishes to enter mom’s basement for the rest of the year. The Jets played the Dolphins, the Matt Moore led Dolphins for a large part of the game, and did what they had to do to lose like pros. Once again, the Jets kept a game close, only to blow a late lead to a division opponent (this time they don’t even have a questionable call to blame). This is the kind of work that keeps the architects of the tank happy, thus ensuring everyone’s employment for another year. To the “performance”! The HGH riddled Josh McCown continues to elude the drug testers and impress everyone watching by simply not dying right there on the field, but the clock is ticking on that one. Matt Forte has been shoehorned back into the lineup, ensuring the stunted development of the young and talented backs on the team and they won just enough games to keep them out of the running for one of the top QBs in the draft. Classic Jets.
On to the winners…
You’ll remember that earlier I mentioned a team that would be fighting to get into the basement? That team is our third place finisher, the Miami Dolphins. It might be more appropriate to call them the second to last place finisher though, because had they not been playing the lowly Jets, they surely would have lost. The Fins season, which to this point has been held together with duct tape, glue and some weird, sticky sap that Jay brought back from that naked beach, may have just burst at the seams. When not even an entire winters’ worth of blubber can protect your QBs rib cage, it may just be a lost year. The Fins are now down to their second, second string QB of the season. While Matt Moore is viewed by many n South Beach as something of a savoir, those of us who are learned in the ways of football know that is not the case. The Fins still have a decent defense, but it won’t be long before they are sniping at the anemic offense and the whole thing deteriorates into a Sharks vs Jets type standoff.
The second place team this week is also the second place team in the division, had the Pats not shocked the world on Sunday night, I fully expected to have the Buffalo Bills in first. Somehow, whether it be with smoke, mirrors or some new kind of Voodoo magic not yet seen in this world, the Bills just keep on winning. It seems that the Bills’ exorcism of all the bad juju this offseason was not as we had all believed an effort to keep up with the Tankdashians, but an actual calculated move that made the team better. You can excuse our surprise, this is the Bills we are talking about after all. The Bills beat the Bucs (a sexy preseason pick to represent the NFC in the Super Bowl for some reason) this week and looked fairly decent in doing so. Tyrod continues to be pleasantly consistent and Shady continues to be Shady. Even the odd collection of stiffs that have been corralled to play wide receiver are doing their jobs. All in all Bills, great job.
And continuing the theme of getting back to the way things should be. In first place, the New England Patriots. The Pats just did what deep down, we all expected them to do. A “quality opponent” came into Foxboro for a nationally televised rematch of the Super Bowl, the Pats were severely undermanned in the secondary and the opponent’s receiving corps were “elite”. So what happens? I think we’ve heard this song before…The Pats utterly embarrass the Falcons by essentially shutting them out. And if only for a moment, all seemed right with the world. The Pats seems to be learning that covering receivers and tackling running backs are important components to playing defense and Belichick seems to have done it again with Johnson Bademosi. And Tom Brady still plays QB for the Pats. They may never lose again, ever.
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